I don’t remember the exact date I prayed to God for a family, but I know within a few months an answer arrived ,and, believe it or not, God does have a sense of humor. I had been single for 11 years, and I pretty much told God, “Lord, if you want me to ever get married again, you’re going to have to bring someone to this church, because I just don’t have time to go out and shop!”
In 1987, I was Single Adult director at church. I always harped on my ministry partners to make visitors feel welcome, ask them to sit with you in church, invite them for lunch, you know. One Sunday I was working, and received a call from one of the workers that we’d had several visitors, they sat with them in church, you know.
The next Sunday, I was standing at the door of one of the classes, and in walks this guy with blonde hair, and the most gorgeous blue eyes I had ever seen on a human being. And he winked … at me! I thought I had just died and gone to heaven! That was a lightning bolt moment. I learned his name was Cary (like Cary Grant).
That same week I was calling all the visitors about an activity we were having. I dialed the number, the phone rang and the voice answers, “Cary Efurd.” I said, “is Cary Efurd there?” He said, “that’s what I said, Cary Efurd.” I said, “did you say “Cary Efurd?” He said, “Is this a test?”
We both laughed, and still laugh to this day when we think about how we met.
A few weeks later I had foot surgery. Cary came over to visit me bringing his guitar, his chess set, home baked chocolate cake, and the Pittsburg (Texas) Gazette (all four pages of it). We talked for hours on end. Over the course of a few months, Cary would call me Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights at 10:30 p.m. after school. I ran to that phone like a giddy school girl while we talked to the wee hours. We have always been and forever will be best friends.
Every Sunday we would sit together in church, in the front pews, looking up at the choir. As time went on, we would hold hands, then he would put his arm around me. Choir members noticed the relationship growing before anyone else (except us, of course).
One Sunday, the Sunday School teacher asked the class to tell their most memorable New Year’s Eve. Cary raised his hand and told his New Year’s story … how in 1984 he was drug to the county jail in Pittsburg, Texas in a strait jacket then sent to Terrell State Hospital for 16 months for treatment for manic depression. He further explained what he had learned about himself and his disease, that he had been sober since 1985, and that he was proud to be a graduate of Terrell State (Hospital).
Oh my! Everyone from church started calling me that afternoon telling me I should definitely stop seeing this guy. I cooled my heels, back-pedaled, and we stopped seeing each other. I don’t know about Cary, but I was completely miserable … it was as if a knife had ripped out my heart.
One evening I was at home, talking to God, confused about this “relationship,” when I heard this voice behind me say, “Do you believe I can heal?” Now this wasn’t a voice in my head, I actually turned around to see who was there. I said, “God, if that’s you, yes, I believe you can heal.”
Cary and I were married on November 12, 1988, having the fairy-tale wedding I always wanted.
Tagged: church, new year, purpose and calling
