For the past six weeks I’ve been on a sabattical from blogging. At last that’s what I told everyone. Actually, I’ve been filled with self-doubt about myself while sitting on a pity pot doing nothing. I’ve been searching my soul to gain clarity on what my purpose is in this chapter of my life. The answer is I don’t have a clue.
It all happened so innocently. Someone I admired made the comment that they love reading my blog, but lately I was getting a “little too preachy.” While I’m sure their comment was not meant to harm, I didn’t take it that way. Before long, one thought led to another and I found myself on sabattical. What I was really thinking was, “well, I’ll show you.”
I made my pity pot pretty comfortable. Soon I didn’t want to leave the house or engage in any activities. I reasoned it was easier to isolate from the world than to engage in it. I was making a statement … the only problem was no one knew it but me.
I know from past experience isolation and self-doubt are killers that lead to very unhealthy habits. I had to push myself to reach out to friends. I’m glad I did, because they didn’t let me down. It was their listening, constant love and words of encouragement that turned my stinking thinking around.
What have I learned these past six weeks? I learned I must remain engaged. I learned I must keep trying. I learned that when I stumble, I must get up. I learned I must always remember I will never be perfect. I learned I must always remain grateful.
I can do this one day at a time … glad I’m back.
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” – C.S. Lewis
