Since my retirement the first of the year, I can’t believe how BUSY I’ve been. How did I have time to work at all? I’ve received a lot of comments about the Second Mile posts. Where have I been? Have I stopped blogging altogether? (NO to that question!) True, I do have some large projects on my plate. True, I am making life transitions. True, I have been travelling. BUT, I am making time today, right now, to share something personal.
For quite awhile I’ve been working on a manuscript for a book being released this summer. I enjoy writing, I love to hop on my soap box and shout out my opinions. But this book touches on circumstances in my life and what I’ve learned from them. While working on the book I’m finding out a lot about ME. The sermon series at church the last few weeks has been on Forgiveness. Sitting in the choir loft taking notes, I’ve been comparing what I was learning about me (while writing the manuscript) to the subject of Forgiveness. They go hand-in-hand. Here’s what I’m finding out …
Forgiveness is admitting that a person has wronged me, recognizing that a person owes me for their offense, and surrendering my right to settle the score. It’s also often the only way to settle a debt. My ears went on high alert when I found out that forgiveness frees me to get on with my life and is an antidote to needless suffering. Can we all agree no one needs to suffer needlessly?
“Forgiveness is a beautiful word until we have someone to forgive,” C.S. Lewis once said. That’s me in a nutshell. I have had years of practice of UNforgiveness. It’s not a pretty picture, especially when you’re the person who thinks they can’t or don’t deserve to be forgiven. For the longest time I thought forgiveness had to be earned; why, I acted like God’s holy prosecutor doling out sentences. I’m constantly learning that forgiveness is unconditional. The Bible says if I don’t forgive, I won’t be forgiven (Mark 11:25-26). That’s sobering.
I want to get it right in this next chapter of retirement. A clear conscience is defined as “Knowing that there is no one who can accuse you of a wrong you have not attempted to make right.” As I continue to work on my book, I’m pondering this statement over and over again. Is there anyone I may have wronged that I haven’t tried to make right?
What if the person I’m forgiving never says “I’m sorry?” When I was little, my mother would grab my brother and I in the heat of battle and make us say we’re sorry. I did the same with my son. Were the kids really sorry for the wrong committed? Or were they simply trying to get a parent off their back? Something else I’m learning in this sermon series is about repentance (a change of mind that leads to a change of direction) and that it’s necessary to receive God’s forgiveness, for reconciliation with another person, for restoration to a position, and for relief from guilt.
When I think I’ve got everything figured out, I find out there’s more to learn. So today I’m living for today and I’m being flexible for tomorrow. Thanks for listening to me!
Until next time …
Tagged: aging, forgiveness
